Of unknown paths and known dreams

There were dire warnings, there were sighs of pity for me. All because I was going to travel alone to unknown but reputedly beautiful lands for 11 days. There were few risks - I'd never before driven a car on the roads here, where strange circles called roundabouts regulate traffic. Despite all this, I set off only with a rented car and my own confidence/ foolishness for company, during which I covered 1600 miles in this small country of conquerors, the size of my state in India.

Planning was sketchy, but the structure proved sufficient. All I'd done was to book bed & breakfast accommodation for all the days and decided where I would stay when. The car was a gigantic, powerful fuel guzzler - large enough to host 6 of me inside. I had plenty of maps, a new GPS, lots of snacks, fruits, water, warm clothing, etc. More than all this, I had too much of advice from well wishers!

I took cruises on lakes, climbed mountains, saw tarns at the top, lots of waterfalls, glens, lochs, marshes, bogs, etc...actually trekking and exploring these routes, being a part of the scenery not a mere spectator. Each day afforded me lots of freedom and time. I would set off in the morning, drive on scenic routes, park my car at the base of some good hiking trail or mountain and just start walking. Thus, I climbed the tallest peak in UK, visited the wettest tarn atop a mountain and saw the most spectacular scenery ever. The journeys were fraught with danger - I wore non marking sneakers where the terrain demanded spiked shoes, carried barely enough water and just peanuts & banana on some of the hikes, had no detailed maps or compass, nor any companion. All I had was the ever present spirit. Many a times I was in so desolate a place that it was beautiful in ways I cannot explain.

Being alone on this trip was the best decision I'd ever taken. As I've written in one of my earlier posts about the difference between being 'alone' and 'lonely', being alone is exhilarating only if one doesn't feel lonely. Fortunately, I've lost the ability to feel lonely (touch wood). There's something about ever new experiences, where memory has no say, where its just the mind and spirit, one watching the other till the mind finally falls silent. Like life itself, there were many paths on the way and little knowledge where they led. I knew where I wanted to go and what sort of experience / scenery I wanted and that guided me. Now and then a kind person turned into a lighthouse beacon. Just like life (again), there were few anxious moments where I was seemingly lost. Not knowing where one has come from and where one is going is one definition of feeling lost. But that is the way we live our life, though we only have a picture of where we 'want' to go.

Eventually the journey planned itself well enough to suit me. The structure that forms my ego in terms of the body and mind, livings its life according to a high level plan called fate with apparent control by the ego - that formed the crux of this trip as well! There wasn't really anything I could have done or avoided that would've made it better. It was enough to have faith and like a dream, it unfolded in the sky of my imagination. It made me financially poorer, but richer in reclaiming the joy that belongs to me always. I saw some more of the 'dream', like seeing the patterns formed by light through the wisps of smoke!